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Thursday, October 29, 2020

Can you fix the Surface Features

Good morning amazing readers,

We learning how to fix surface features. You might be asking what is a surface feature? Surface features is a little bits in your writing  like spelling, repeated words, adding full stops and punctuation. 

We had to fix some of the repeated the word in our writing. We need to use surfaces features  because it makes our sentences easier for other people to read.We also had to fix are if we had to much writing.

We made our own copy of this document and had to read what we had to do for the document. We go to the room 9 site our teacher Mrs T had made a link for our writing to make a copy of this document and had to read what we had to do next.

Then  we had to high light all of the repeated words and change them to something else. It sound better if its not the same word all over again. We  had to change the word /"he because it has been repeated to many times.

Yesterday we read through it together at the same time and added some paragraphs. We got some people at the front to read our loud at people are Xavier, Rinaz and Sean

This is not my story it is someone else is story it was one of Miss D's old student we didn't know where she get that or she just made it up.

An example is: thissentsaChulymakessen Zbuttisrellyhrd to reed
Can you find what does this say?

This is the writing we had to fix.

He kept absolutely still as the footsteps got louder he tried not to suffocate as he laid under the bed he was wondering what had happened to his brother and his family. The man with the knife in his hand stormed around the house. Mums had boyfriends before but we had not thought that they would ever find us maybe he was one of them looking for revenge but why would he come. mum would just move and how did he find us we live on the other side of the planet from where all of mums boyfriends were so how could he find us he might have put a tracker on mum when he last saw her or on one of the devises ‘Hello where are you I know your here you're going to tell me where you're mother is or you shall join your father... in the skies so which will it be death or freedom you have 10 seconds chose wisely’.

Here is what I fixed.

Roman kept absolutely still. as the footsteps got louder. He tried not to suffocate as he laid under the bed. Wondering what had happened to his brother and his family. The man with the knife in his hand stormed around the house.


Mum has boyfriends before but we had not thought that they would ever find us. Maybe he was one of them looking for revenge. But why? Would he come?  Mum would just move. How did he find us? We live on the other side of the planet from where all of mum boyfriends were. So how could he find us? This man  might have put a tracker on mum when he last saw her or on one of the devices.


“Hello, where are you? I know you’re here. You're going to tell me where your mother is or you shall join your father... In the skies. So which will it be? Death or freedom! You have ten seconds to choose wisely.”


He has been repeated the most.

He is your main character.

I have to change some of the he's.


Can you spot the different's? Please let me know at the comments down below.

Thank you for reading my blog post I hope you learn something from it. Please leave a comment and have a great day.

1 comment:

  1. I like that you gave the man in your story a name Liyahn.
    It makes it more interesting and gives the man a stronger presence in the story.Where did you get the name Roman from?.

    ReplyDelete